I’ve tried, Believe me I’ve tried

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For long i had seen this coming
The day I must say my goodbyes
And off you go, forever out of my life
Never to look back, stop and think
Of a heart, that you never saw sink

Yet, here i am, standing on the brink
Of this abyss that I’m about to fall in
Not wanting to let go, bear this intoxicating pain
How can i face the truth and stop being so naive?
Tell me, how can I forsake this love, that kept me alive?

Walls, masks, distractions, layer upon layer i built
These ravaging waves of anguish i silently slit
But nothing was enough, my sturdy walls inadequate
When it came to keeping you out, my mind just quit
All its efforts in vain, all its defenses slain

I’ve tried being numb, I’ve tried being cold
I’ve tried to let go, I’ve tried loosening my hold
I’ve tried to forget, I’ve tried to move on
To find a new way, to find a lasting cure
I’ve tried, I’ve tried all this while you’ve been gone

Today as i sit and ink this last goodbye
I realize how it is and it will forever be
After all this time and always
You’ll be Lily and I’ll be Snape
I hope, I pray, May you find the love of your James

 

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