The dark side of love


darkness_wallpaper_4

There’s a white mist all around me. I cannot see an inch further. I stumble and hold out my hands to catch my fall. I shout but no voice comes out. I listen but no sound wavers. I look but no vision flickers. I can feel a tight knot in my throat. A throbbing in my chest. A heaviness in my head. Fear? No this wasn’t it. I look back trying to find the path I had come from but there’s only the whiteness of the void waiting for me. They say it’s the dark that makes you blind. Today, I had experienced otherwise.

With my head held high,
with my hopes on the fly,
I inch forward,
with noone to guide me by

I wish I knew
Of my impending doom
Down I went
With a shattering boom

Into the deep hole I fell
Down the never ending ditch
Little did i know I had fallen
Down the dark side of love.

The dark side of love? How could something so bright, so hopeful, so white have a dark side? It wasn’t hatred. No. It wasn’t a darkness. But it was like a burning candle. A bright light that falls on your face. But as you try to grab it, it burns. It burns the very flesh of your body. The searing pain going all the way to your heart. Making you feel like a thousand bolts of electricity are coursing through your veins instead of blood. The pain isn’t constant. Neither is it temporary. But it comes in jolts. After several moments. One moment you feel vacant, empty, emotionless. The other you feel like a vacuum consuming you from inside. A black hole at the very centre of your existence.

It’s painful to feel so immensely about something yet unable to get to it. It’s like a door. The closer you get. The farther it goes. Love isn’t supposed to hurt. It isn’t supposed to open up wounds. It isn’t supposed to slash and burn. Yeah it doesn’t. But the dark side of love does.

Down there deep in the ditch I lay. Looking at the tiny light high above me. Beckoning me. Calling me. But I cannot get out.

Life’s like this. There are times when you fall in love either with the wrong person or with someone you cannot spend your life with. And then you fall down this ditch unable to get out on your own. You wait for someone to pull you out. But who really cares. People walk by. Looking down on you and move ahead. The waiting clock ticks from days to months to even years. And all you can do is wait for a saviour that may never come. Sitting there silently as you soul slowly crumbles to dust. As your being soundlessly shatters to nothingness.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s